The Common Gym Types


The time of year has come again where the gym attendance has thinned out from the first of the year comebacks. All those with the new year’s resolutions that just don’t stick have given in to the call of the pillow and no longer clog the parking lot and popular machines. Admittedly I have missed a few weeks with various other demands, but this morning I crawled out of bed even though I just got back from a few days on traveling for business. I had no trouble finding a parking spot and there were no delays getting to machines I wanted to use. Perfect workout conditions.

This morning I thought of gym experience and had a good laugh at a comic sent to me online on a similar subject. I looked back at some previous days in the strip and found one that was right in line with something I always laugh at when going to the gym – all the “typical” gym types you see. Isn’t it funny how we can so easily categorize groups of people by the way they look and act? Yes, I know it is shallow and judgmental, but you have to admit it is a bit fun too.

There are of course all the “regulars” that you see there at the same time every day without fail. These people over the years have either become of stayed fit before your eyes simply out of diligence and seemingly never cutting their workout short. Those days you slink out early because you are tired or have some early business to attend to, you can almost feel their eyes watching you leave and shaking their heads at your lack of dedication.

I work out in the morning, so I have much less experience seeing those there at the gym for the purely social interaction, picking up on the other single people you dress up and preen for all the opposite gender attendees they have their eyes on. My wife takes the evening shift on workout time, and she says the teenage and young single crowd is a hoot to watch, much like an animal mating dance documentary on the Discovery Chanel.

I’ve already mentioned the New Year’s crowd, typically overweight or low on muscle tone because they only manage the gym for a month or two at the start of each year with some periodic one-week refresher attempts sporadically through the other months. I can’t knock them too hard because I am no Mr. Universe material, but we can still classify this type and laugh if we belong in the group.

The comic pointed out a couple of others that I had to laugh at, including the gossipers and mother trying to get those pregnancy pounds off. I’ve seen many of both these types, especially the rebounding mothers being that I live in Utah County, reproductive capital of the world. The whirling legs flying and speeds beyond what seems possible in the superhuman effort to work off those baby bearing pounds in record time were the part that had me laughing out loud.

There are many other categories that could be created, so next time you head to the gym take a look around and see what new ones you could share with us. I’d love to hear them.